Monday, July 28, 2008

I'm Pissed

Bre called lastnight and she's doing really well. She's gone thru grenade training (was 1st in her group for range and accuracy, I told her it was all those years of playing 3rd base varsity softball), totalled 3 humvees during driving training - thankfully they were simulated humvees, and spent a week learning triaging and first aid - she got the vein the first try when learning how to do an IV, unfortunately the guy that did her had to dig for it.

She was in the midst of cleaning her guns when she called.

And all of that is not what I'm pissed about.

During our discussion we talked about her equipment and she told me that while she was in Iraq if she had to travel in a convoy as intelligence she would be in an "Up-armored humvee", when I asked what that meant she said that they are basically a better protected humvee. That they will survive an IED attack, they would roll around but still protect against a bomb blast. My response to this and not directed at her....but why doesn't all our people over there get FUCKING UP-ARMORED HUMVEES, holy shit, what do you mean we have a way of protecting our soldiers and we can't supply it?!

But wait, it gets better. Mr and Mrs Fooner are supplying Bre and Mike with better equipment than what the military hands out (and that is a whole 'nother post that requires me to figure out a way to express my gratitude to those two wonderful people), we've bought her a pair of Oakley sunglasses that are bullet resistant, multi-use tools that are an upgraded, ect. Well, it seems that alot of people are doing this for their family members and the companies that have contracts with the military aren't happy about it. So those companies and our government are talking about now NOT ALLOWING military people to carry anything not made by a company that doesn't have a military contract. WTF-ever. I said to her, you're getting issued the stuff anyway, so what difference is it to them if you buy elsewhere. Well, it seems that what they're issued isn't as good of quality as the stuff they can buy at the PX/NEX, so they want you to upgrade, but only from them. My question - WHY THE HELL AREN'T THEY GETTING THE BEST STUFF IN THE FIRST PLACE? I understand contracts, what I don't understand is the mindset of these people.

I hate greed. And this is what pisses me off.

Monday, July 21, 2008

It's hard to go to OT right now

Everytime I go there I read about Mystic and Mr Mystic and my heart shreds.

I laid in bed lastnight thinking about her and him and praying. And I cried myself to sleep thinking how easily we lose that which we love.

I think/hope Rob and I have that kind of relationship and I can't imagine never hearing his voice, or being able to reach across the bed with a foot to touch his and it broke my heart for her.

I know that alot say that everything happens for a reason, but when things like this occur it's hard to believe those people.

I went floating yesterday, just me and a friend. I found some flowers that I wound together and sent them floating downstream with a prayer for Mr Mystic/John. I hope someone heard it.

I still don't understand how bonds are formed with people I've never met and most who I'll never meet, but know that I think of all of you and most on OT as true friends. And I truly hope Mystic does find comfort on OT because she is loved.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Another kind of ritual

Preparations made, candle lit, water runs hot, the scent of Karma fill the air, an icy cold one had been cracked. O.A.R.'s Shattered plays softly in the background.

Slowly she steps into the barely tolerable, immersing with baby gasps. Muscles tensing then slowly relaxing as the heat demands. She feels beads of moisture rise across the bridge of her nose. Perspiration, no exertion required.

Not physically, anyway.

Gradually she lays back, liquid enveloping her body as scents envelope her mind.

An escape this ritual must remain.

She raises one foot, noticing the blush of heat, wondering about the bruise on the back of her calf. Adjusts the flow with one Aphrodite's Pink Nightie painted toe.

Silently she picks up the bottle, noticing absently as the perspiration runs slowly down the sides, much like that which runs down one cheek. Sweat or tears, it doesn't really matter nor which you can tell.

An icy pink fingernail scratches at the label, until a memory from college surfaces, laughing slightly she allows the finger to continue. If anything this night is true is she could be described as frustrated.

Tipping the bottle, she feels the cold, icey in direct contrast to the heat simmering around her. The bitterness of coffee and chocolate melding well with her mood.

Pulling the bottle away she spills a droplet on her chest. Suddenly her whole existence centers on that one small spilled drop.

She bargains.

A direct line to navel and the universe promises, promises all will be right.

She slips deeper into the water as that betrayer of promises slips under one breast.

She feels bubbles rise around her neck to playfully tickle earlobes.Stupid, stupid bubbles, don't they know they're just hastening their death?

A prayer on swollen lips, she starts..."Dear God"....and the prayer dies. She's forgotten how, it's been too long. Again she tries. Again she fails.

She tilts her head back, resting on that curve that has held her so many times before, this time it fails. Tears creep from the corner, falling, sliding, on their way to speed the dying of those sweet, silly bubbles.

With a last heroic move she slips below the surface......

Thursday, July 10, 2008


1. Ok, what would you say if your married 4 times sister told you she was having an affair with a married man that has two kids? *sigh

2. What would you say if an online friend told you she was thinking of having an affair?

3. What would you say if your bestfriend told you she thinks her husband is fooling around?

4. Why is my life surrounded by cheaters!?

...... and why hasn't anyone said how cute I am in the picture below dammit!

I'm not having a good day.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Morning Rituals

I am a ritualistic person. And if my ritual is thrown off I'm out of whack for most of the day.
I used to get up 2 hours before work to have "slow time" but now since I work from home I only get up an hour early.

I stumble from the bed and into the bathroom for morning ablutions, I'm a shower at night girl so I'm done pretty quick. Walk to the door and let Diesel out, then into the kitchen to pop a cup of water into the microwave for tea. Back into the bedroom where I dress, and believe me that takes no time anymore, t-shirt and shorts. Ding, I plop my tea bag (I do vary my tea flavors, right now my favorite is Constant Comfort) into the hotwater and let Diesel back in. I add some Splenda to my tea and a splash of sugar-free hazelnut creamer.

Only now am I ready to cozy up to the computer where I play all the quizzes before doing anything else. Then I check out OT....and then I start reading blogs. I'm a bottom reader, not to be confused with a bottom feeder! I start with the bottom of my "Read blogs" list, so Zombs if you're reading this you're always first, so write more :) A quick click and I'll know if something's new and I'll be reading or not, you all don't write enough, I can tell you right now.

So by the time I'm done my first cup of tea is finished and I'm awake enough to start work.

So what's your morning rituals like?

And if you are not on my "read list of blogs" please tell me, the more blogs to read the more awake I will be :)

Monday, July 7, 2008

Marriage tag by the Puffmeister

1. What date is your anniversary? We celebrate 2 since we lived together for so long. January 19th the day we.....first.....and May 7th, actual wedding date.

2. Where did you get married? Vegas, on Mother's Day at 4 am, at the Little White Wedding Chapel in the Tunnel of Love on the back of a Harley by Elvis.

3. Who proposed and how? I'm sticking with "He did", and I'm not really sure. Someone (he) said if we were ever going to do it this is the way it would happen and suddenly we were getting the license and poof.

4. How long were you engaged? Ummm, I guess about 2 hours. That's about how long it took to stand in line for the license and drive to the chapel.

5. What was your favorite part of your wedding day (and it can't be your husband). The cheesiness of it all.

6. What would you change if you could? I would wear something besides a black shirt and jean capris :) Wait, nah.....I wouldn't. So nothing.

7. There's no # 7.

8. Remember anything special about your wedding ceremony? It was all memorable.

9. Were you clean or messy when you cut your cake? We didn't have a cake. Maybe I would change that. Because I love cake!

10. Where did you go on your honeymoon? We stayed in Vegas for 2 extra days because we were saving for our 2 weeks in Hawaii later that year.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

The End - Picnic and Goodbyes

My Mom, Mike and Bre...Mom hates this pic, don't tell her I posted it :)
Bre and Mike drowning their sorrows at being the biggest losers on the croquet field.

Rob, BFF Lori, her daughter Ashley and my brother Tracy

Sister and the girls :), Mike, Bre and Me

The day started off great and with minor bumps stayed that way.

I had gotten almost everything done for the picnic the night before. The menu was simple. Dips, chips, burgers, brats, bbqed ribs and whatever anyone else wanted to bring. A friend had borrowed my big grill and was bringing it back this morning by 11. He didn't get there until 1pm but we adjusted and as I had decided to do beer ribs it didn't take much time to finish them off on the grill.

Bre and Mike were in charge of burgers and my brother Tracy and Rob were in charge of the brats and weiners. We had so much food it wasn't funny.....and beer, oh my heck did we have beer. And margaritas and wine and chocolate cake shots and green lizards and....yep, we had a liquor store worth of drinks.

So we pig out, and it was delicious. Except my bff Lori didn't bring the Dump Cake, but that was probably a good thing as it would have put us right over to a coma. And then it's Croquet Time, notice the capital letters :)

I forgot to pick up an extra set of balls and mallets, so we all teamed up. Somehow my brother and Rob became partners and my sil and I were teamed up, otherwise it was all husband/wife, girlfriend/boyfriend, mom/daughter, etc. I'm probably the most competitive person I know but I've tried to calm it down in recent years so people will play with me :) but if I hit your ball in croquet you can bet I'm going to "send" you. *sigh I really try to be nice. But.....

Anyway, with one lucky shot my brat of a husband and my brat of a brother beat me and Donna Kay (isn't that an Okie name *grin) by one stroke. Ugh. Team Lucky (them) are the only ones that became poison. I like being Poison *pout! Team AnnaNicole got killed and Team Navy came in last.

We had a ball.
We started a bonfire and made s'mores and sat around and talked for a long time. Being a Sunday night the crowd started thinning fairly early. I think the last person, my mom...she's such a partier....left about 9:30. Bre and I cleaned up inside while the guys picked up the yard. And then we dropped into bed. By this time I'm thinking I'd pay good money to stay in bed for about 12 hours!
Cordie, Rob's mom, wasn't able to come to the picnic as Don had gotten out of the hospital only to have to be taken into the ER the morning of the picnic. His kidney had started bleeding, so they transported him to Tulsa. She was upset but I promised we come by the next day.
So Monday morning we head over to her house and have an early lunch with her at Chili's. Mike's grilled hard about his intentions, I would have felt bad but we warned him about her. And I have to say I was very impressed on how he handled himself with her. Not many can stand up to the Cordie lectures.
The kids have to get their stuff together so we head home. I grill steaks while Bre and Mike are packing and we have a nice dinner on the deck and watch a few dvds that evening and we're off to bed.
The next morning we're up and gone early. Stop in at IHOP for breakfast and get the kids to the airport in plenty of time. They are headed to Vegas from here where they'll be for 6 days, I think, then Mike heads back to HI for 2 weeks and Bre's off to Cali then to WI. We hug and kiss goodbye and send them off with a wave.
Rob's talking away and my chin's quivering. I haven't cried since we put her on the plane for Hawaii the very first time, but this time feels different. Rob looks over and asks if I'm crying...the idiot :).....and I start bawling, ok not bawling but pretty close. It's over quickly and I'm least for now.....
Rob and I stayed in Tulsa for the day....Barnes and Nobles, Ricardo's, the motorcycle shop and then we met up with Lori and her crew....grabbed icechests, pizza and lounge chairs and went to the drive-in and watched The Happening....Ugh.
Bre had a ball in Vegas and as I post this she is getting ready for her first day of Combat Training.

Part Six - Float trips and Bar tips

Top picture taken last summer - The nieces (drunkey on the left) and Bre with blond hair.
Bottom pic - Bre and Mike at the bar after float trip
I was dumb and forgot the waterproof camera I wanted to get at Walmart, so no pics of the float trip. Damn it. One of the big things I regret about the visit.

We got up early and were ready to go when my nieces showed up. One of which was still drunk from the night before, and yes I was totally disappointed with her. She wound up crawling into bed and not going, which her sister probably had way more fun without babysitting someone that was already starting out drunk.
So Rob and I have our kayak's (we learned long ago if we're going to stay married we do NOT share a canoe!). Mike and Bre have a canoe and Jill and Nikki were suppose to have one. But....we get one canoe with a third seat. In retrospect I should have reserved a time.
Mike had told me out of everything we had planned for the visit this was the one he was least looking forward too. Seems in Philly you don't go near the water, but he'd already been flyfishing so he knew the water was okay. He asked if there were bathrooms along the river. *snort Um, no honey, there are bushes. He also didn't want to get out of the canoe into the water and sink in muck. You won't I assured him.
So we meet up with brother and sil, and take the short bus trip to the entry point and get set up. And we're off. For about 20 feet. Mike, Bre and Jill....plop. Over they go. Along with most of the 3 point beer ( I was smart and kept the 6 point with me and Rob). We get them situated again and scoop up the beer and head off again. We're only doing the six miler as we've got 2 newbies with us and I don't think they can handle the 13 miler. From the beginning to the end those three went over about 7 times, most of the time for no earthly reason but for one of them leaning to far over the side to look at the fishies. Or Bre getting daring thinking she could pull herself back in. But I have to say, all three are happy while tipsy :)
It was a gorgeous day, lots of sun with a cool breezy. We all had a great time. And we have two new float trip enthusiasts.
So we get home and all take showers and head to Granny's Attic. Rob has most of the pics on his camera, one of these days I may post some but probably not. SIL got really drunk, as in porcelain goddess drunk, but still had a good time. We have new converts to Chocolate Cake Shots also :)
This was probably my favorite day of the whole trip, but Sunday was pretty fun also. I just had to work more.